I open Veracross more frequently than my text messages, not because it benefits my learning, but because constant access has trained me to obsess. This access to grades is supposed to help students stay on track. Instead, it quietly shapes student identity, reducing learning to numbers and percentages. It was not always like this. 

At schools like Seattle Prep, this level of academic surveillance is relatively new. Founded in 1891, Seattle Prep once relied on paper report cards, teacher feedback, and periodic evaluations. Before the 2000s, grades were finalized at the end of quarters and mailed home, rarely accompanied by conversations with teachers. The shift toward online grading systems began with platforms like Veracross and PowerSchool, and after COVID, online grade portals became the norm. Paper report cards disappeared, and constant academic monitoring began consuming students’ minds. 

These emotional consequences are not anecdotal; they are documented. According to the Journal of Adolescent Health, higher anxiety levels, up to 30 to 40 percent, have been recorded among students who check grades multiple times per day. Additionally, 78 percent of teachers report that online portals increase requests for extra credit and point disputes rather than promoting content understanding (Education Week, 2021). I have watched my confidence rise and fall with each update, even when my effort and engagement in a class remain constant. It has become impossible to separate who I am as a learner from what appears on the screen. Instead of asking meaningful questions about learning, I negotiate decimals. Education becomes transactional. Learning becomes secondary. 

This phenomenon is not a flaw in student character, but the result of a system that encourages constant self-monitoring. This reality creates a conflict within Jesuit education. Jesuit schools emphasize growth over time, yet when students are taught to refresh their screens instead of reflecting on their progress, the power of a holistic education is lost. If schools truly value student well-being, change is necessary. Teachers should notify students when grades are slipping rather than relying on students to check constantly. Online grades may be efficient, but efficiency is not the same as education. The beauty of the unknown, even in grades, gives students a moment to breathe. Growth happens when the screen is closed, and for me, reclaiming joy began with logging out of Veracross.